I got married at 22 and haven’t had to worry about these kinds of things, thank goodness.
But for those of you who are single and looking for politically compatible love, John Hawkins’ latest feature on conservative women and dating is an entertaining and useful read. She blogs at Conservatives with Attitude: [Hawkins:] Have you dated liberals before? I have always had a policy of not dating liberals, but once, after a bad break-up, I dated a couple of liberal guys…
Douthat skews conservative, but actually has some data on his side.
Even though liberals like to tout their sexual permissiveness as a strength – how can I get married unless I’ve sampled lots of the merchandise?
Which brings us to the crux of the argument posited by Ross Douthat, a conservative columnist for the liberal New York Times.
Is the liberal vision of marriage, with lots of dating, sex, and blurry gender roles superior the chaste conservative vision of marriage, where people get married younger, have children younger, and reserve sex for committed relationships?
By contrast, liberal Democrats were more likely to say they must have a partner with a sense of humor and independence who can articulate his or her needs, respects them, is physically attractive and comfortable with his or her sexuality, and has the same educational level. For example, while a majority of men and 90 percent of women checked the “must have” survey box for “sense of humor” — a quality that itself is both a longtime online dating and Playboy centerfold questionnaire cliche — conservative Republicans were the least likely to select it. Fisher, adult humor generally plays on the unexpected, something conservative Republicans may dislike because of biology.“There is more and more data indicating that there is a biological basis to your political views,” Ms. “I’ve found in other studies that Republicans are more likely than other political types to be expressive of traits linked with the serotonin system.”Serotonin is a chemical neurotransmitter produced by the body that is believed to influence social behavior and feelings of well-being and happiness.“Among those traits, Republicans are less comfortable with the unexpected,” Ms. “They like order, predictability and the familiar.“Moreover, Republicans are quite concerned with values, following the rules and being respected, more traits that are founded in the serotonin system.
When it comes to amorous relationships — from dating etiquette to what people desire in mates — singles at opposite ends of the political spectrum are as different in the bedroom as they are at the ballot box.
Also, conservative Republicans are more likely to experience orgasms. Such are the results of “Singles in America,” a wide-ranging new survey of more than 5,000 single adults designed by the University of Binghamton’s Institute for Evolutionary Studies and conducted in conjunction with the dating website “Liberals and conservatives are looking for entirely different things,” said Helen Fisher, a biological anthropologist at Rutgers University who specializes in love and sexuality and consulted on the survey.
I’d encourage you to read the whole thing, but this observation (taken from the comprehensive work of the University of Chicago’s General Social Survey) was particularly interesting and runs counter to perceptions fostered by pop culture: For many years, researchers found that women were happier than men, although recent studies contend that the gap has narrowed or may even have been reversed. Again and again, young boys are shoved into a quiet, more relational, submissive box.
Political junkies might be interested to learn that conservative women are particularly blissful: about 40 percent say they are very happy. As the father of an active young teen boy, what I’ve seen from other parents — the unbelievable stifling — seems cruel.
Conservatives tend to stick with the one man, one woman, sex within marriage model. People are marrying later, waiting until they are financially stable, delaying engagement until their love has stood the test of time, aware of the pitfalls of divorce, and so on.